Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The Umbilical Cord

Have you ever heard the saying

" They haven't cut the umbilical cord yet?"

I have just searched my good friend Google for a meaning to that saying and it came up with this:

''cut the (umbilical) cord
to stop needing someone else to look after you and start acting independently''

Something happened today that made me think about the imaginary umbilical cord that I think exists between a mum and her children.

The background to this story is the fact that I work very close to where Chipmunk goes to school.Its literally a stones throw away at the Infant School which is next to Chipmunks Junior school.
And although I never go across to the junior school I suppose it's quite comforting to know if needs be I could be there in under a minute.

I never knew how important that feeling was until I was on maternity leave whilst having Chipmunk and I had to leave Sharky at school and go home.I then realised that I was further away at home from him than I was while I was working!It was quite a weird feeling and a realisation of how lucky I was to work so closely to where my child was.

Well today Chipmunk went to the pantomime in town,the whole school went,oh no they didn't...... oh yes they did!
And I stood and watched the children,teachers and parent helpers file past the nursery window and into the coach.

And as I saw Chipmunk walk up the school drive it felt as if he was going away from me and I could literally feel the imaginary cord stretch and I didn't like it!He was gone,not anywhere mega far but further than he usually is,on a coach,totally out of my reach.

I know he will be fine and I'm pleased he's so excited,big bag of sweets in his pocket,a drink in the other pocket,all fun for a eight year old and certainly beating a day spent slogging away at maths and English.

It did make me think of the imaginary umbilical cord tho and my feeling is that for many mums and certainly for me,that cord is never really cut.
I like to think it just stretches.Little by little.

Every moment your precious little baby lives they get a bit further away from you.They stop feeding from you,they begin to crawl and then walk and then run and it's sometimes away from you and towards independence,which we all know must happen.

They start toddler groups where you stay and play with them,then progress to nursery where you leave them for three hours at a time,then it's school and they are away from you for six hours at a time and they have lunch times away from you and then they go to juniors and you don't get the contact with their teachers quite as much as you did in infant school,then they start to want to walk home from school on their own,then it's comp and the 'No way do you come anywhere near my school Mum!'

The little steps lead to bigger steps and that imaginary cord stretches accordingly.

But as for having it cut nah not for me thank you.Too definate,too final,no can do.

I would never want to hinder their independence,I realise how important their independence is for them but my cord will not be cut,once my baby always my baby,even if they are six foot tall and living halfway around the world!

I think stretching is a good thing.It allows for flexibility and my door will always be open for my boys no matter how old they are,if needed and I mean 'if' needed and only if needed.

Now just a hour too go to find out if Chipmunk enjoyed the pantomime,let's hope I can say later Oh yes he did!

No comments:

Post a Comment