Perspective

I had this thought when I was walking home from work on Monday,we had all started back to our places,schools and work and I was just thinking about the boys and age.

 I can remember thinking that at every stage when the boys were growing up that they were getting older....milestones they passed,birthdays,changing schools etc were all too obvious signs to me that the boys were growing up fast,much too fast for my liking.

If it were left to me I would have slowed time right down so that I could have savoured their childhood even more then I did.

They were just so precious I wanted to hold it all oh so tight and drink them all in and I so wanted to remember them,their sleepy little yawns,their cute sayings,their sweet voices,the way they walked,the way they fed as tiny babes,their first gummy smiles,all the incy tincy bits that made them 'them'

 

I often think Tiger would probably never been born at all if it were left up to me!

I loved being pregnant even through the morning sickness and the near  pre-eclampsia and I used to feel that my baby was safe from everything whilst I was carrying it.
Every where I went they went too and I liked it that way.
I knew that the moment they were born and that umbilical cord was snipped the big bad world would slowly but surely begin to impact on my sweet baby and also the slow but gradual pulling away from me would begin.

But as we all know these babies have to come out and they begin to grow and change on nearly a daily basis,especially during those early days.

I was never one to rush any of my boys on with any milestones,in the job I do it is all too apparent how quickly children grow...blink and you miss them!

I did however fall into the trap of thinking as each progressing stage went by that they were getting old for want of a better word.

Kinda like this.... when they weaned I felt that the milky baby days had gone....when they took their first steps they became toddlers....the transition to nursery,then school to juniors to comp and even finally leaving school at each step I felt that they were so old...not in a grown up way but in a bittersweet way where I virtually mourned yet another stage of their precious childhood going.

And then I had Chipmunk!

There was a 7yr age gap between Chipmunk and Sharky and a 11yr age gap between Tiger and Chipmunk and as I watched him grow I truly realised just how young they still are at a year old and at nursery age and even at 7,8 and 9yrs old.

Because I could so easily compare him to his two older brothers.

When I looked at them,I could see that five years old was nothing compared with 16years old and so forth and it gave me a different perspective completely on age in general.

When I look back at photos of Tiger at junior school I realise how young he actually was,whilst at the time I thought he was quite grown up!

When I think about my mum being a grandma at my age I think how very young she was to become a grandma.

When I see Tiger approaching 21,the same age I was when I met his father,I think how very young I was and also how very old I thought I was!

I can remember having Tiger at the age of twenty seven and thinking I was sooo old!These days I think I was quite young to have a baby at twenty seven,certainly not old!

And this leads me to wonder if when I get to the age of seventy or more (god willing) will I think forty seven is young?Probably!

It's all a matter perspective isn't it!

What do you think?